Anyone who’s seen the F-150 Raptor knows it’s not just any old F-150. This isn’t the meager entry-level XL trim, with its two doors, svelte frame, and simple wheels; this is a hearty beefcake of a pickup truck. You automatically get a second row of seats and doors, the grille fattens out with Ford’s name tattooed across its chest, and its frame and wheels balloon to absolute fullness… and that’s just the exterior!
Presuming you’re not willing to burst inside an F-150 Raptor that’s pulled up beside you at a red light, you’ll have to visit your local Ford dealer to climb into this magnificent mac-daddy and experience its blistering performance, off-road domination, and utter brilliance for yourself. So, F-150 Raptor, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways…
#1) Your Sturdy Bed
Four cargo tie-downs are only the beginning; your standard zone and box lighting make our night time excursions to the beach far more enjoyable for me and the boys as we lie under the stars and question our place in the universe. Accessing your bed is made simple with your optional tailgate step—and with the remote tailgate release on the key fob, too.
Your mighty cargo bed can be blanketed with a protective drop-in or spray-on bedliner, and you can safeguard my precious 1,400 lbs of cargo with a hard-folding, soft-folding, or retractable tonneau cover. The most promising available adornment for your bed is the 2,000-watt outlet that converts your beefy engine into a portable generator. Speaking of which…
#2) Your Exciting Engine
Your standard power plant is a 3.5L High-Output EcoBoost V6 that generates an incredible 450 hp and 510 lb-ft of torque, and I can activate you from afar with your standard remote start. You can be upgraded to the 5.2L “Predator” High-Output Supercharged V8 in the high-performance Raptor R trim, and this large-and-in-charge engine outputs an incredible 700 hp and 640 lb-ft of torque.
These momentum factories are fed by a massive 36-gallon fuel tank and impact the earth via the standard SelectShift ten-speed automatic transmission with progressive range select and paddle shifters. Your optional auto start/stop technology increases fuel efficiency, which is oh-so-critical to maximizing your second-class fuel economy—but you prioritize sheer power over efficiency, so that’s forgiven.
#3) Your Astonishing Performance
All that power funnels through your hi-lock transfer case and divests as needed to all four of your 17-inch wheels—and your standard four-wheel drive is a rarity in pickup trucks as hardy as you are. Each wheel has its own anti-lock brakes, and your BFGoodrich All-Terrain tires chew up the earth and propel me through all kinds of environments.
These adventures are made buttery smooth by an independent front suspension (with long-travel front upper and lower control arms), a five-link rear suspension with Panhard rod (with electronic-locking rear differential), and sport-tuned FOX shock absorbers on both the front and rear (with live valve technology). Your standard Hill Start Assist helps me get up in the morning, and your AdvanceTrac with Roll Stability Control and Curve Control keeps me balanced.
#4) Your Versatile Support
Your sturdy cargo bed, powerful engine, mighty wheels, and spongy suspension make my life easier, but the journey wouldn’t be so effortless without your comprehensive assistance assets. For instance, your built-in tire pressure monitoring system has taken a nagging burden off my shoulders, and standard remote keyless entry is an unsung grace. Your wide, heavy-duty skid plates—under your front end and engine bay—likewise remove a bushel of worries.
You also give me more control over my drive than I ever thought I deserved. Your selectable drive modes number seven—Normal, Sport, Tow/Haul, Slippery, Off-Road, Baja, Rock Crawl—and yet you double down on this generosity with your Trail Control One-Pedal Drive mode, which lets me tackle bumpy roads with one foot firmly on the gas pedal rather than jostling between it and the brakes; instead, you halt as soon as my foot removes from the gas.
#5) Your Steel Hitch
I love your Class IV Trailer Hitch, rated to tow 8,200 lbs (or 8,700 lbs if I spring for the Predator engine). With this incredible setup, I can cart a massive recreational vehicle or a small yacht, which makes me the de facto leader for vacations with the boys.
It’s easy to hook up my trailer thanks to the standard rearview camera with Dynamic Hitch Assist, which guides me in reverse for perfect syncing. Driving with such heavy cargo hooked behind me doesn’t weigh me down, either, thanks to your stout engine and brilliant torque—and my anxiety about towing in traffic is mitigated thanks to your standard Integrated Trailer Brake Controller and your BLIS with Cross-Traffic Alert and Trailer Tow Coverage, which watches my wake so I don’t have to.
#6) Your Captain’s Chair
Since you come with the SuperCrew cab by default, my passengers and I get the most interior space feasible in a full-size pickup. I feel like a king when nestled in my leather-upholstered throne—a ten-way power-adjustable bucket seat that is both heated and ventilated. The best part is that you always recognize me, as my seat shares memory settings with my pedals and steering wheel, which will all adjust upon my approach with my key fob in my pocket.
You’re easy to get going with your standard push-button start, and you’ll moderate our travels with Adaptive Cruise Control with Traffic Jam Assist, wherein you’ll self-regulate your speed based on your proximity to the car ahead of you. Your dual-zone electronic automatic temperature control keeps me cozy, and optional rain-sensing wipers keep my views clear—but the best part about your captain’s chair is the views inside: the 12-inch Digital Productivity Screen and the equally-large capacitive infotainment touchscreen, through which I can monitor my 360-degree camera to view the world around us.
#7) Your Mastery of Music and Quiet Engine
That 12.0-inch infotainment touchscreen is the anchor of your cabin, hosting my means of communicating with friends and family and playing my favorite playlists and podcasts. Built-in SiriusXM is a real boon for gluttons like me (and the three-month trial subscription had me hooked from day one), but this is made even more enjoyable via the standard Unleashed Sound System from Bang & Olufsen.
You have an optional wireless charging pad for my smartphone, which is a generous accouterment, and I’m further benefitted by your standard 4G LTE Wi-Fi hotspot—and once my phone is synced and set down, I never have to pick it up, thanks to SYNC 4 with Enhanced Voice Recognition, which allows me to issue commands without my hands. But my favorite part isn’t how you’ll let me or my media sing—it’s how you do it.
You allow me to control the sounds that emanate from your two portly tailpipes. Your Active Valve Exhaust System lets me match your sonorous engine output to my mood with one of four modes—Quiet, Normal, Sport, Baja—so I can be stealthy in suburbia and outrageous in the outback. Some may say you’re “too big,” but personally—my sweet, beloved F-150 Raptor—I love a vehicle that’s a bit unwieldy to take down Main Street.
